5 checkpoints for a relationship! (2 min read)

At the age of 24, the questions like what is life?, how you picturize yourself after 5 years?, what is your expectation from your partner?, relationship goals, parents expectations, peer group, and most importantly what now you are doing which leads to your satisfaction level?…… All these questions will haunt you every day. All these questions are unanswered, neither an experienced person nor google can answer your questions. YOU yourself have to figure out!

Yesterday, he was on social media and i asked him “whom you talking to?” he replied “Jessica!” I out of curiosity asked him again “Who is she and what are you guys talking about?” He replied with a bit of irritation – ” About work!”

Before going to bed i checked their messages and found out it wasn’t work but an new conversation between old college-mate,  with whom he never talked before but have seen each other many times. What do you think has happened next?. Ahha! I acted as i was jealous but actually i was mad at him for not replying properly when asked. This wasn’t the first time he did this. An opaque wall is developing between his and my mind, I am unable to read his mind. He is becoming a puzzle for me to solve and with every coming day, we are becoming more strangers.

“I don’t know what went wrong. Our relationship was headed in a positive direction and then—wham!—it all fell apart.” We don’t talk anymore like we use to be, we don’t share anymore like we use to be. Something is changing, Something is not right or i am just overthinking. Whatever it is but i know one thing that it should be fixed on time, or else time will create a long distance in our relation.

Love, friendship, intimacy, passion, mutual support… all these relationship benefits make for a happier life. Ah, that special someone you can laugh with, who shares your hopes, dreams, and Healthy relationships make you healthy and help you feel secure, strong, loved, and loving – at least some of the time.

Yesterday reading an article about 70 yr married couple died holding hands; I wondered how these people last longer? The only key to their successful marriage is they fall in love with the same person over and over again after every bad break. Bad breaks are scary, change your world upside down but a better understanding and goodwill can be life saviour.

Here are five of the most common checklist for healthy and inspiring relationship, Critically analyse and evaluate as per your own understanding and situations.

1. Giving mental and physical attention:

Making room for a new partner may help you to get over with things you’d forgotten were there. And, of course, he or she certainly has hidden hurts, too. The issue is not the wounds we carry or the scars we bear, since everyone has some of those. The issue is the willingness to examine and work through emotional difficulties. To succeed in a relationship, both partners must be willing to sift through and do the work required to get over a painful past.

2. Avoid lies and Dishonesty:

Lies destroy TRUST component of any relationship. A person’s need to lie is a telling clue about his character and emotional health. It may indicate serious insecurity, lack of integrity, or flimsy moral standards. And if dishonesty shows up while dating, it’s likely to only get worse during marriage. Here’s a sobering fact of life: If your partner is willing to lie to you once, he or she is likely to do it again. But if do lie,make sure that you have a good reason to do so; otherwise thing may not end up the way you want them to be.

3. Jealousy and Possessiveness:

Freedom to be yourself—without someone else constantly telling you what you should or should not do—is critical if your relationship is going to thrive and flourish. Few relationships are able to survive extreme jealousy, possessiveness, over dependence, or manipulative and controlling behavior. Such actions and attitudes are a sure sign that one or both people lack a solid emotional foundation. Placing excessive demands on your partner’s time and attention may seem like a normal expression of romantic love. In reality, it is a destructive form of domination. 90% relationship end up due to jealousy, insecurity and extreme demanding behaviour.

4. Avoid living in fantasy world:

When a woman describes her man as “my perfect Prince Charming” that is Unrealistic expectations which serve as treacherous sinkholes on the road to lasting love . But ground reality is no one is PERFECT; like the two sides of a coin; every perfect looking thing has it’s own bright and dark side but at a time only one can be seen. In a healthy dating relationship, the individuals acknowledge that nobody is perfect and there will surely be problems to address. Every relationship will require hard work and perseverance.

5. Embrace each other’s success:

Being supportive towards each other’s work and achievements will mark a milestone of your happy and healthy relationship. There’s nothing wrong with believing the best about each other, admiring your partner’s positive qualities, and nurturing dreams of a bright future together.

To make the partnership last, take them off your fantasy world, and be alert to warnings of trouble while it may still be avoided. Because life never gives the second chance;  it only gives you the second lesson.

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