Worthiness!!!

Repeating the same thing again and again.

Life life will give you nothing but pain.

Finding the way out of your miseries.

count on me ,when you are at fisheries.

People will call you for what is not worth.

When things are done they won’t call you, not even for once.

They will show you what you got from their work.

Now their significance is undesirable.

Defining the odds into the mist of dusky sun.
Prioritising your level of efforts.
Monitoring and controlling each task.
Closure of every lot with the same enthusiasm and charm.
The most difficult work always, keeping the pace with the time.

Why love first when you looking for career, why it is important to take rest in the first lap of marathon.
Who told this? Why there is a need?

Are we not satisfied with ourselves.

Walking on the path which is directed by someone else. What was the rush? Why new task attracting mostly in your adulthood rather than now. Are we less matured back then or we were crazy?.

Probably our out braking systems of brain are Fully developed now. Directing every decision made.

Only when you are successful!

img_20191025_173631.jpgThings people hear from you only when you are successful:

1. Personal motivation

2. Stories of struggle

3. Personal thoughts

My senior always share his personal thoughts and stories of struggles at various levels but when it comes to us for sharing he stop listening, that’s when i realise your thoughts, power for motivation and struggling stories have voice only when you reached a point where others show interest to hear your jingles.

If you have lost the battle without desired output, no one will listen to you untill to convert your failure into success.

Lesson learnt: Tell your story only when you have achieved something in life. Work for yourself first.

 

Do you?

I was alone mostly for a long time of life, hence always preferred to be alone most of the time, was pretty good at the alone thing. Then you came along from nowhere and my whole world changed. I was so independent but abruptly started liking to be dependent on someone for everything, but in the process of doing so how could I forget that would be killing his desire to be free of responsibilities till he can!

Falling in love with you was the most beautiful thing for me. Because things are beautiful when they are shared. Nobody had ever done the lovely things for me except my family and nobody does it better. I started liking to get married, and have kids. Whereas he started developing to back to the childhood free of tension and anxiety.

One fine day I woke up, off to work on my bike, got into accident only thing I remembered is his name and wanted to go back to him because he will take care of everything. The only thing that I was worried about was, what if I didn’t die in his arm and at this particular point of time where ambitions are still not fulfilled.

I often like to be in control but mostly these chemicals in our brain control us. I may have accused you of many things which are always compelled by the desire for more but nothing to do with us.

Why do we run hills when finding the slightest connection? Why do we compel to fight for the things that provide a spark to your routine? maybe because we were afraid to lose the things that we are attached to “the unusual”.

I am reckless, weary, angry, most of the time reluctant to take risks as you. I want to be married to you. I always wanted someone, the strings, the connections, the kids, the noisy house, the family to take care of and the festivals to celebrate together —— DO YOU? Do you still care?

We skipped one step “Career”, jumped to “Love” first. The biggest mistake in life. Will you be able to find way back to me? or this diversion turns into despicability? –  only Time will tell.

 

 

11 Reasons why I fall in love?

It’s been years since we have been talking to each other. I still can’t find the reason why i fall in love with you in the first place? was it my readiness or your uniqueness.

Love is a trap, no matter how conscious you are, you will always fall for it and if it’s not your first then you are at more risk! If you are fair than its “GOOD”, If you are Smart then “Better”, and if you are sexy than “BEST” but worst combo if you are neither fair, smart nor sexy. After years of togetherness, you conclude it as a robotic act with less enthusiasm and spark for breathing. I summaries it as a journey of strolling up and down the corridor. We have created a bunch of irreplaceable memories to embrace throughout our whole life. There’s no difference between falling in love and being in love. Falling in love with you is like falling into something which is great and exhilarating and a teensy bit scary, but mostly great. There are many things like walking down the streets holding hands, shopping at the grocery store, cooking and dropping at stations that I fall for ever time. How can you be so perfect for me? was it me or the timing responsible for this mess?

“Watching you sleep was not only just your thing, was mine too!!” Your every breath reminds me of the first time we met. Most of the time i am afraid of losing grip on you because of which i kept on asking you why you love me? every now and then.

Increased levels of oxytocin [often called the ‘cuddle hormone’] and Dopamine is the biological way your body reacts when you are in love. Why people fall in love? The most generalized answer to this is a general attraction and various social factors producing strong passion.

According to various researchers, the attraction and the social parameters producing intense passion are:

  1. Similarity [ Similarity in believes,  traits and the way of thinking]
  2. Propinquity: [familiarity with the other, caused by spending time together]
  3. Desirable characteristics: [focused on an outer desirable physical appearance and desirable personality traits]
  4. Reciprocal liking: [When the other person’s liking that increases your own liking]
  5. Social influences: [One’s social network, can contribute to people falling in love]
  6. Filling needs: [fulfill needs for companionship, love or act of love]
  7. Unusualness: [an unusual or arousing environment can ignite passion]
  8. Specific Cues: [One’s  physical appearance of the other may ignite a particularly strong attraction ]
  9. Readiness: [Wanna be in a relationship]
  10. Isolation: [Spending more time alone with another person]
  11. Mystery: [Due to some mystery surrounding the other person which creates  uncertainty about what the other person thinks or feels, wondering when he or she will initiate contact can also contribute to getting attracted to that person]

The researchers found that the most frequently mentioned factor is certain desirable characteristics of the other person and reciprocal liking. whereas very less frequency of the factors that spark passion (e.g., readiness or unusualness).

The use of positive illusions, a couple’s ability to feel empathy for one an another, continuous communication and the ability to control emotions during highly stressful situations act as strong adhesive to remove friction in a  long-term relationship.

My love falls into the category of unusualness, making more difficult to replicate once again. There’s neither similarity nor reciprocality involved from the beginning, making more difficult to find the way back to each other. I will try to develop some romantic skills like singing or playing some musical instrument. Maybe you will find a new reason to love me again in the next few years. Take all your space and time you need to build your future, will always be happy to see you succeed whether I will be part of it or not!

After all “Entrepreneurship is living a few years of your life like most people won’t, so that you can spend the rest of your life like most people can’t.”

An era of love!

Some facial expression are so damn expressive that no words required for their impact to be felt. People with strong facial expression are more contagious and make you fall in love with them.

The moment you were born into this humanitarian world, you work hard, study and one damn day you fall in love with the cutest smile around you and thereafter everything changes. Your efficiency affected by his words and your mood now dependents on his mood, in short the end of your era. They will try to modify you according to their expectations.

U never know unconditional love if you have never loved some one before
U never know when they become much important to you than your respect..
U never know when they stop loving you and move on
U never know when they crush your heart and throw it in a bin..
U never know how deep heartaches can be…
U never know !

Love burns can be messy. Take long to heal.Creating a mess with the burns that you have given to yourself are deadly and become more painful when not visible by naked eyes. Then your heart need escape plan as you are responsible for your happiness. Look for inspiration because:

Inspiration is not mistical, unachievable thing,
Inspiration is a sea,
That sea turns into vision,
That vision turns into goal and hopefully that goal turns into victory!
Hopefully….

The burns from your love to my heart is disaster
Creating whole messy twist and turns. Making me realise how painful all this love can be when it’s just one sided.
My love is not like yours, I can’t fall in love again and again like you do.
“Love me or not, i will cherish every moment with you.
Like me or not, I will be there for you.
Miss me or not, I will remember you.

“How to thrive in man dominated industry?”

It’s been 08 months since I have started working in well known construction industry as a primavera P6 expert.

I am 25, and this journey was full of ups and downs. It was clear after high school that I was going to work in technology; after completion of graduation I worked for few months and realized the need of post graduation to fit in. When about to complete my 2nd sem of Infrastructure engineering and management” i got a call from recruiting website for an interview and started working along with my studies.

I worked hard to survive through all odds and got interviewed for getting up on permanent pay roll. Being a women you come to people’s attention more easily and things become more difficult when you are free minded. People always have something to talk about you from top to bottom. Your every action monitered and judged. I feel intimidating to break into man dominated industry but women have so much value that we need them to take the leap.

I am happy to get the chance to shape my personality after every encounter with hurdles that could have stopped me from accomplishing  in technology. Confidence and constant determination required when you are surrounded by people who don’t believe in you. In the beginning you need to push yourself to your max with patience above all humiliations.

Overall, you have to constantly prove yourself, earn respect, and have to be better at your job than a man does. They will always question your technical soundness and mental preparedness to tackle sudden unavoidable critical situations to object your credibility when you are placed above them. This question can be avoided when you have enough exposure of the respective field by breaking the walls of insecurity and anxiety around you to flourish quickly with less objections.

The Way You Look at…!

“The Best feeling is the one when you at him and he is already staring at you!”

There is something in his eyes that says, “Honey I Love you!” with a smile on his face whenever we use to meet. Now things have changed a lot. There’s no sparkle in his eyes when he saw me. I miss the way he use to look at me.

This month was hell lot more for me, professionally, emotionally as well as financially. Nothing goes as planned.  This month can’t be more worst than this, I already lost everything including you.

How do you know when there is still chances to get back to each other?

It’s for you…. Straight from heart….

I will love you forever because the memories you gave neither replaceable nor repeatable.

I will love you because you gave me freedom to feel free to chase your dreams.

I will always love you because you were there for me when everyone left.

I will  love because i don’t ever needed to be fake to you just to make you happy and love me more ( You already loved me more than I wished for..)

 

 

My project manager

Civil engineering Jobs are dominated by boys due to the fact that it’s the most challenging job and you have to work in frequently changing environment. Being a civil engineer myself, I find it difficult to work and constantly groom yourself while working with changing environmental conditions along with the pressure of constantly performing well. Apart from environmental conditions there are various factors affecting your performances are internal conflicts. How well you resolve those will push you to greater heights professionally​.

My project manager is a lady PM(one and only lady PM in every branches across country. She is taken as symbol of women empowerment and wants more women to join the work force like her and be the part of nation building with proper environmental,health and safety measures.

She is driving force and beating heart of site at work.

May ladies like her come in future and be part of nation building.

 

 

Breakeven point

How you get to know that ” he is the one! the only one! for you…”

I saw him at railway station for the very first time,when traveling with friends to same place. He was one of my friends friend. i don’t remember much of it but the judgement i made that day, about his character, unfortunately remained somewhere in my mind “whoever he love will be a lucky girl” i don’t know why and how i concluded that. I almost forgot about that day when me met again.

After that, meeting went to infinite loop. Loving someone form the core of your heart, caring about each other in every possible way you can and constantly motivating each other for better is nothing but felt like heaven.

Many people asked me,” what’s your story?”  when i don’t reply they assume that either i am introvert or shy, but neither i am introvert nor shy.

I don’t have a story to tell about us, just a girl in love. 

He is love of my life and i can’t love anyone like the way i love him. I generally don’t talk about us because there’s nothing but intense feelings, which is hard to explain. It’s was like when i was drowning, he saved me. All i want from him is to pick me, choose me and share with me till he can. “I love you” and “you love me”, all i want to hear is this from him and i don’t care about anything else. I don’t want to live without him. We have changed a lot in past years and things  pushed to breaking point but whatever happens will bring us more closer. It’s not the time to give upon each other.

It took so long for me to realise that i wanted to be in his life. We promised each other, there’s no running and hiding, no matter what happens, we will stay together till the end because this is our life this our arena, we can’t and we won’t give up.